Wednesday, September 23, 2015

Responses to "Anon" Questions - His Answers

As I've whined about before, I have a hard time with responding to comments in blogger when I am logged in.  So, it's better that I respond in post-format.  His questions are mainly about cuckolding, which hasn't happened much lately.  My Queen is aware I posted recently (she asked me to summarize during our last play session) as well as the comment from "anon" and I discussed over a rare breakfast together that it would be nice if she "guest blogs" to get her perspective.  Not sure if she will or not, but I can hope...

I have been wondering a bit how your wife feels about, has changed, thought processes etc since you started your journey?

I'm thinking about things like:
1. Is your wife more selfish now in bed or in general? 
I wouldn't consider it "selfish".  We are both on board with sex being primarily about her.  It turns me on, and I think she enjoys it too.  I think I am better at avoiding "topping from the bottom", which had been an issue when we first explored femdom.  I prefer long drawn out sessions with lots of teasing, perhaps multiple female orgasms, but it's not our reality right now.  We are a busy couple and sometimes we simply are too tired to play, sometimes I can convince her for a quick vibrator induced orgasm, and rarely we have had sessions when we are home alone that are easily more than an hour.  I don't think this extends into our outside bedroom life at all.  She's a very loving, giving kind soul.

2. Does your "play" extend into your "other" life as well because of your wife?
I'm not sure I really understand this question.  If you mean outside the bedroom, not really.  She will occasionally poke me in the ass in the kitchen, pinch my nipples, and slap my balls discretely if we have a moment of privacy.  We are a very "normal" soccer mom couple and I think most folks would be surprised that we are as kinky as we are.  Our child(ren) are a little sickened at how lovey-dovey we are.  I'm actually a bit proud of that fact, that we are modeling a loving relationship.

3. Does your wife initiate you giving her an orgasm more often now? Is it because she doesn't have to recipriate?
Generally speaking, my wife wants me to initiate sex.  I described a recent session where she woke me up and we had intercourse.  I enjoy her initiating sex a lot, but that doesn't happen that often.  During foreplay, she sometimes says things like, "OK, I want my orgasm now", which is pretty exciting for me.  I do think she's more open to sex because she is not obligated to "deal" with my orgasm.  She likes that the focus is on her.  I am interested in her thoughts on this.

4. How does your wife see you now compared to before?
I've asked her this, and she says she doesn't see me any differently.  Part of me wants to think I'm a candidate for husband of the year, but I am not sure she'd go that far....

5. How has your wife changed since your cuckolds started?
She seems more sensual, more sexual to me.  I believe we communicate better.  She has a different frame of reference.  Being somewhat submissive in the bedroom, I typically ask her if I can do xyz.  She made it clear just the other day that she enjoys that her "friend" is more assertive sexually and wants me to do that too.  Something we will be exploring soon... 

One thing that took me a while to get my head around is that she has made it clear that he is a very good kisser (and, I presume better than me).  It does make me feel a little "funny", but I want her to be honest with me.

6. How does your wife look upon the cuckolds and the inequality that brings?
My wife is NOT on board with me having sex with another woman, and we clearly have enjoyed our initial foray into cuckolding/hotwifing.  I like to be teased about the inequality.  For me, it's a big part of the excitement of cuckolding.  We had a rare moment the other morning and she told me that a) she masturbated; b) she shaved her pussy "for him".  My underwear was quite wet with pre-come by the time I got to work.

7. Is your wife happier now?
This seems like a pretty broad question for her, interested in her response.  If you mean with respect to our relationship, we've had ups and downs like any couple, but right now we are in a huge up.  Sexually, she is quite satisfied.  As a long time observer of her climaxes, I can tell you that her orgasms have never been stronger.  If you mean with respect to cuckolding, I'm not sure I can answer that.  I think it took her a long time to get her arms around that I'm OK with her having sex with another male.    

8. What does your wife want to happen/explore/test in the future?
She definitely wants to have sex with him again.  They've had a lot of "near misses".  She wants him to orgasm with her (he basically claims that he can't come with a condom.  WTF) and she wants to have sex somewhere besides a car.

Assuming they do have sex again, I would like to be locked up.  Idea of her having sex and me being physically unable to is really hot "inequality" dynamic for me.

I would like her to try a younger guy that is OK with playing with me there.  A big turnon is for me to find her "suitor" for her.  I have looked, and there are males out there that I believe would work.  So many things we could do....

She gave me hope once by saying, "we should go to a cuckold party where I can have sex and you can't".  Made me very hot thinking of that.  Then she said, "stop trying to pimp me out" - and so I dropped that idea.
How do you see yourself in the regards of the above?

Bear in mind that we are very new to this.  She's had sex twice with him.  I have told her that the actual cuckolding was more exciting than the fantasy.  We are having a lot of fun with this...


  1. Just found your blog and I appreciate your openness of sharing your experiences of both you and your wife, with something very personal. I think it takes a very strong marriage to be able to introduce another person into the sex life. As I was looking at the answers to the questions that you posted, I was wondering if the other person is someone you both know, and knows about the marriage as well as the lifestyle? Thanks for sharing.

    1. Hello kolika,

      The other person is someone I know from work. My husband does not know him and has never met him. He has heard of me speak of him though. :) The other person does know about the marriage but does not know that my husband knows that I'm having sex with him.

    2. Hahaha...didn't realize my husband already replied.

  2. My reply to your response to my questions are over on my blog.

  3. Just found this blog and really enjoy this discussion. I personally love when my wife tells me what her other lover does well. Recently she told me how much she enjoys sucking and swallowing with him--not something she enjoys with me. A huge turn on.