Take our play session last night. I was very horny, and was thinking of sex all day (isn't that what 3 day weekends are for?). We had one session of sex since her period was over just a few days before, and I was really lusting after her. To amp up my desire even more, the prior night we had a fun date night (she described it as "creative") but we were both very tired when we got home, and didn't have sex. But we were all over each other cuddling the entire night and morning.
I texted her that I wanted some kinky sex, so she knew what was on the agenda. As bedtime approached, I discretely shaved my face and chest and put on a tight pair of thongs. One thing I have noticed lately is that the actual prepping for sex turns me on quite a bit.
We did a lot of groping and kissing, and I began sucking her left nipple. I could tell it was turning her on, and starting touching her crotch (no panties!). I got on top of her in a 69-ish position to prep her and I was really turned on by going down on her. I switched positions into a 'normal' cunnilingus position with her on top and me on my stomach, between her legs. She really gave me a lot of good nonverbal feedback, and - for whatever reason - I could do no wrong going down on her that night. She was moaning, arching her back and hips ~ it was fantastic, and I knew she was going to come. And she did.
When she comes from my tongue, I feel virile and on top of the world. She "came down" from her climax, and I was hoping to get into her pussy. She said no. I tried to ask if I could just get a handjob or at least dip into it and she was clear that she wanted me to be all over her the next day, so no orgasm for me. I got the impression that an orgasm today is not a sure thing either, so I am not taking it for granted.
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So, the angst? I really, really wanted to fuck her last night, but she turned it down. Why? She does prefer me horny. Because she can. The angst I feel is illogical to me: I am frustrated that I didn't get to enter her, but highly turned on that she dominated me. Positioning myself between her beautiful pussy and getting her to the 'promised land' is just about the most satisfying sexual act I can do. The contrast between my love of cunnilingus (although I do admit, I am not always successful with it, but I still enjoy it) and the fact that she rarely gives me blow jobs anymore. The contrast that I was the one horny and she was the one who experienced the climax. It really hit my submissive 'buttons'. I am a happy sub.