Thursday, September 12, 2013

Female Orgasm Supremacy: orgasm disparity more pronounced than I thought

My domme is doing an excellent job in teasing me and I am over the top horny all the time.  In my extreme horny state, I have been researching more about orgasms (I do miss them....).  I came across this video, which I thought was very interesting:

I sent the link to Suzy but she hasn't checked it out yet.  What interested me is the comparison between male and female orgasms at 1:09.  It says that a male orgasm lasts 3-10 seconds and then they have a refractory period where it is impossible to have sex for minutes (I assume that's for young bucks) to hours.  The female has an orgasm of 20+ (note the plus!) seconds without a refractory period.  So, on average female orgasms are three times longer then male orgasms.

In addition to the disparity of the number of orgasms Suzy enjoys, hers are also of much longer duration.  So if you factor in our long term female to male orgasm ratio of about 3 1/3 to 1, and orgasm duration that is 3 times longer than mine, that means that she has about ten-fold more total orgasm enjoyment than I.  And, qualitatively, her orgasms in general are more intense than mine.

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I am enjoying riding this femdom wave.  It's fun to play with sex being focused on the woman's pleasure.  As I stated in my last post, I am internally conflicted as to whether I want to come or keep going with the flow.  If Suzy were to ask, I would definitely say that I want to orgasm.  However, I am really enjoying NOT being asked, and leaving it totally up to her as far as when she wants me to be released.

In spite of my sexual frustration, I love the feeling of intimacy and closeness we share.  I am still digging into this more, but it seems as if the flood of oxytocin in my brain is enabling or making me want to 'court' her.  After our sex play is over, and into the morning, we cuddle with an intensity we've never really felt before.  I am a happy, if frustrated, submissive husband.

Monday, September 2, 2013

Orgasm Denial Angst

I realize it's been a long hiatus since I last posted.  There are many reasons for this, that I perhaps may share at a subsequent post.  Even though I haven't blogged, we have continued to explore female dominant sex play.  I suppose it comes and goes, but my Domme Wife has done some amazingly kinky things, which makes me very grateful.  It has affirmed (as if I needed this) that I am a true submissive and long to satisfy her sexually and have her in control of my sexuality.

Take our play session last night.  I was very horny, and was thinking of sex all day (isn't that what 3 day weekends are for?).  We had one session of sex since her period was over just a few days before, and I was really lusting after her.  To amp up my desire even more, the prior night we had a fun date night (she described it as "creative") but we were both very tired when we got home, and didn't have sex.  But we were all over each other cuddling the entire night and morning.

I texted her that I wanted some kinky sex, so she knew what was on the agenda.  As bedtime approached, I discretely shaved my face and chest and put on a tight pair of thongs.  One thing I have noticed lately is that the actual prepping for sex turns me on quite a bit.

We did a lot of groping and kissing, and I began sucking her left nipple.  I could tell it was turning her on, and starting touching her crotch (no panties!). I got on top of her in a 69-ish position to prep her and I was really turned on by going down on her.  I switched positions into a 'normal' cunnilingus position with her on top and me on my stomach, between her legs.  She really gave me a lot of good nonverbal feedback, and - for whatever reason - I could do no wrong going down on her that night.  She was moaning, arching her back and hips ~ it was fantastic, and I knew she was going to come.  And she did.

When she comes from my tongue, I feel virile and on top of the world.  She "came down" from her climax, and I was hoping to get into her pussy.  She said no.  I tried to ask if I could just get a handjob or at least dip into it and she was clear that she wanted me to be all over her the next day, so no orgasm for me.  I got the impression that an orgasm today is not a sure thing either, so I am not taking it for granted.

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So, the angst?  I really, really wanted to fuck her last night, but she turned it down.  Why?  She does prefer me horny.  Because she can.  The angst I feel is illogical to me: I am frustrated that I didn't get to enter her, but highly turned on that she dominated me.  Positioning myself between her beautiful pussy and getting her to the 'promised land' is just about the most satisfying sexual act I can do.  The contrast between my love of cunnilingus (although I do admit, I am not always successful with it, but I still enjoy it) and the fact that she rarely gives me blow jobs anymore.  The contrast that I was the one horny and she was the one who experienced the climax.  It really hit my submissive 'buttons'.  I am a happy sub.