Sunday, June 24, 2012

The waiting is the hardest part

Woman laying on couch, with man rubbing her feet says “You should desire me at all times, but only act on it when I’m in the mood.”
Note also that she is relaxing and he is massaging her feet.
My domme is sick and therefore wants me to leave her alone.  As opposed to me, sex is the furthest thing on her mind when she is sick. 

I have been denied orgasm for approximately two weeks, so I am besides myself in wanting to play with her.  The cartoon above captures her sentiments exactly.  She wants me to be horny and lusting after her at all times.  But she wants to act on it according to her schedule, e.g., if it fits her workload, she is healthy, she is not too tired, etc.

I left her completely alone last night, and she said she was feeling worse this morning.  Historically, Sunday night has been the night where we have the most active sex play.

To borrow a sports-related phrasing, my sexy wife has had six "unanswered" orgasms (translation: six in a row, with none for me) over the past two weeks.  She has suggested that I wouldn't get a sexual release until July 4 (my own ejaculatory fireworks corresponding with our holiday fireworks that night).  She has done an excellent job of teasing me during this denial period, so I am massively horny.

When I am as teased and denied as I am now, I have lots of sexual fantasies.  I am constantly thinking of sex, wondering if we are going to play or not, and whether I will get to come.  These fantasies get more and more hard core.  Perhaps that is for another post, but suffice it to say that she teased me by ogling a guy with a really good body when we were out to eat the other night, and the handsome young waiter we had yesterday seemed overly attentive to her.  She isn't shy about pointing out "eye candy" she sees.  This plays upon my MFM/cuckolding fantasies that she is very aware of.

My wife blogged about her reading 50 Shades of Grey.  I was at Costco and asked her if she wanted it (secretly hoping she would).  She seems to be tearing through it, and seems excited to talk to me about it.  It is a role reversal of our situation, with a dominant male and submissive woman.  She has brought up a few times the female submission contract that the male lead Christian Grey wants his submissive woman to sign.  Since I am so horny, I have fantasized about us having a femdom contract along those lines.  I don't know if Suzy has any interest in that, but it is certainly keeping my randy mind turning!

*  *  *  *  *
Her excitement in reading this book, along with the accompanying play we've had is making me a content, if horny, submissive male.  I rather like the idea of her reading a sexually charged book, and either talking to me about it, or just unfurling her female dominant desires upon me.  I am excited about her next move, I just hope that we can still play, in spite of her illness and heavy upcoming workload.

I asked her the other day, and she agreed that I am doing a good job of not "topping from the bottom".  I hope to continue submitting to her in this way.  This FLM play is very exciting to both of us!
Color photo of a nude man and woman laying in a bed.  He is on his back, one arm at his side, the other around her waist, as she lays partial on his chest. She has one leg draped over one of his legs, and his semi erect cock is laying on his belly, just touching her hip. She has a smile and look of contentment in her eyes.  There is no white residue visible making it highly unlikely he came. 
This is so like us, snuggling and basking in the after glow of the female orgasm, with not a drop of sperm allowed to escape.  Love never ends, when we  keep our vows through eternity.

Not everybody’s going to get the same thing out of this photo that I do, but what I see is him hard and wanting, and her loving him for giving up that control to her. That, even more than being turned on by her control and sacrificing for her, is what makes submitting to a woman you love so incredible. There’s something absolutely amazing in putting her wants above your own.
Found this photo, which I think exactly corresponds to our recent play.  The look on the woman's face reflects complete sexual satisfaction and contentment.  Her lover's still erect cock reflects a longing for more stimulation, an incompleteness of sexual arousal, but nevertheless a high degree of arousal.  She seems content to leave it that way. 
A very sexy photo, in my opinion!

Friday, June 22, 2012

Sensory Deprivation

If I were to boil down my kinky fantasies, the main element is control.  I love Queen Suzy to control me and I love surrendering control to her.  An excellent way to provide her with even more control over my body is with the use of sensory deprivation.  This is where she reduces or eliminates my senses, in a sexual context.  Here are some ways we play, or I would like to play, with sensory deprivation:

Male restraint
Of all the kinky sex we've tried, being tied up makes me feel the most submissive.  The feeling of being unable to move as she does - well, whatever she wants to do - is amazing.  The converse is pretty hot too - when I have to voluntarily open myself up to her torments and "take it like a man".  But I really love being unable to react and the feeling of struggling against the restraints is amazing.  Tie me up, tie me down!
Being physically restrained results in less control.  Less control results in sex the way the woman wants it.  Sex the way the woman wants it leads to a sexually satisfied wife.  A sexually satisfied wife leads to a happy submissive husband.
A special honorable mention goes to vertical restraint.  When I am blindfolded (see below) handcuffed in a standing position, Suzy's blows to my body become undetectable.  As opposed to the bed, I can be attacked on all sides.  My ability to anticipate goes out the window.
I enjoy being restrained in a standing position, mainly because Suzy can stimulate any part of my body.
This male has a nice toned body.  I wish I had a body like this.
Blindfolding seems to be Suzy's main mode of sensory deprivation.  We have some "regular" adult novelty blindfolds, but I also have a hood that completely covers my head.  I can't see out of it at all.  I enjoy using that one.  At any rate, Suzy will sometimes order me to put the blindfold on and then dominate me.  She has forced me to listen to her masturbating with the vibrator.  She has sprawled out on my body and I had to "enjoy" her ogasms with just her undulations and the sounds of her pleasure.  Very hot!  Being blindfolded is lots of fun.
He could so easily slip that belt off his wrists and ankles…clearly he doesn’t want to. Such a good boy.
Blindfolding forces me to use my imagination.  What is Suzy going to do?  I like suprises!

Sound deprivation
We haven't tried this.  I would like to get some ear plugs and perhaps a pair of over-the-ear headphones to really drown out the noise.  In that way, I would be unable to hear the whoosh of the spanking implement and therefore I would be totally caught off guard.  This could be quite painful but quite submissive too =P
*leak leak*

I love her outfit. The hooded slave is nice too.
I could not find an image of a femdom couple playing with the male having ear protectors.
Nice CFNM theme in this scene.

Touch deprivation
Suzy had pleasured herself in a way that I can't touch her.  I can just hear her orgasm sounds.  It's frustrating, but fun.

She needed a rest after all that tying! They both look very relaxed and comfortable. :)
This reminds me of when Suzy masturbates with the vibrator and I can only hear her moans of pleasure.  I really like that.
I wonder if this sub shook that martini for her.

*  *  *  *  *

I think I've had this post drafted for months.  We seem to be playing more in this space, so I thought it was a good time to publish it.  I am a big fan of sensory deprivation, and I hope we can keep playing this way.  Keeps a submissive male guessing!  Cheers!

Monday, June 18, 2012

A weekend of female dominant sex (Wife 4, Hubby 0)

My Queen has had a project going on, which is partly why our play time has been reduced.  We had a late date night Friday night and my Queen stimulated my cock and balls (with some ball slapping thrown in) while I drove home.  However, when we got home, it was too late and we were too tired to engage in sex play.

Saturday night she had a paper to write, so she worked on it all day.  I fell asleep, naked.  My Tigress Queen woke me up and fucked me.  She said she needed a 'stress reliever'.  The early details are a little foggy to me, but suffice it to say she got me hard and then she was riding me cowgirl style.  I will say without hesitation: woman on top sex is pure awesomeness!  This is the only way she can climax with my cock alone.  She did so, which was fantastic. 

Woman on top is the way to go!  Notice how she is holding her man's arms!
She indicated that she did not want me to come.  As a side note, I appreciate when my Domme is very clear about what she wants, or in this case doesn't want.  She did want me to penetrate her, and she specifically asked for doggy style.  It was rather lovely to mount her and feel her hot pussy engulfing my cock.  I penetrated her as much as I safely could, but then realized I was getting close so I withdrew my penis.  I think we ended up doing some more missionary position penetration.  But it was still very clear that I wasn't to come.  Somewhere in this play, she used the vibrator for another spectacular female orgasm.

This caught me all by surprise.  She used my cock as a human dildo, which I am more than happy to do.  In fact, I kept thinking about it all day Sunday.

We exchanged a few sexts on Sunday, and it was clear that Suzy was interested in sex play.  Specifically, sex play that would involve pain for me.  I knew the general theme would be tying me up to a chair.  As a prelude to our dominance/submission play, I was naked in the bathroom as we were getting ready, and she used a makeup box to swat my cock.  Right before our eyes, I become erect as she steadily swatted my cock.

The front porch is a great place to play.
The chair was a prominent part of our sex play; she instructed me to get one that "wasn't too comfortable"
We started our sex play off with me giving her foreplay, and a quick female orgasm with the vibrator, to demonstrate her sexual dominance over me.  The submission act began with me being tied to a chair, hands behind my back, legs restrained to the front legs of the chair, and blindfolded.  I had laid out a variety of whipping implements that she used on me.  I guess the only part of my body that was spared was my ass.  As the session progressed, I would become erect, then get soft.  She frequently recharged my boner the same way she did that morning, with light smacks on my cock.  Halfway during the session, she paused and used the vibrator for her fourth orgasm of the weekend.  As it were, that was the final orgasm for either of us.  She again made it clear that I was not going to experience that orgasmic feeling that night.

She laid in bed basking in her orgasmic delight.  She teased me, saying she might fall asleep (I was still very bound).
Suzy made extensive use of biting; we both liked it!

She then resumed her torture session.  She was liberal with nipple torture, and she said later that she was literally biting my nipples.  She worked over my body, torturing one part and then returning to my genitals to make sure I was erect.  It was a long, drawn out tease and denial session.

I love the sound of you whimpering.
Ouch!  Nipple torture was a prominent feature of our femdom session Sunday night.

For the finale, she knelt in front of me and manually administered cock and ball torture and then pinched and bit my nipples.  The sensations of the blows to my balls was different than normal, since my testes were hanging down "like a pinata" as opposed to resting against my perineum.  She did seem to enjoy the dominance over my body.  She finished off the session but plainly announcing that we were done for the night and that I should get ready to go to bed.  I put the toys away and kissed her and thanked her.  She said I did a good job of submitting to her pain, and she seemed proud of me.

*  *  *  *  *
I could go on and on.  It was a major dominance and submission weekend.  Some final thoughts:

  • Prior to our Sunday session, I shaved my chest and pubic hair, including my scrotum.  Good move.  It made me feel more submissive, and "more naked".  I think that really added to the CFNM effect, and it allowed Suzy to have maximize access, including use of her mount on my nipples.
  • I purchased 50 Shades of Grey for Suzy.  It has a lot of hoopla, as a mainstream S&M novel.  She has moved through it pretty quickly, but she seems to enjoy it.  It is a male dominant theme, which doesn't appeal to us at all.  She will point out various bits to me, but she said she hasn't really got to the sex part.  She is at the point where the dominant is asking the submissive to sign a D/S contract.  Is that in my future?  What effect on our sex life will this book have?
  • My erections are a major component of our sex play - even if male orgasm is not.  Suzy likes the explicit desire that my hard cock represents.  While I am definitely very horny, achieving a solid erection via tease and denial - and being completely nude before her - is very satisfying.
  • Suzy enjoys sexually dominating me.  She must.  She directed all sexual activity that happened this weekend.  I didn't "suggest" anything.  I didn't top from the bottom.  Sex was on her terms, and she chose to dominate me.  She was rough with me, but I liked it.  I like that she pushes my limits.  I like that she studies her slave's responses to the stimuli she induces.
  • I like that she clearly tells me what she wants or doesn't want.  Two examples were: she told me to penetrate her doggy style but I was not to come.  Later, she clearly said, we're done, get to bed.  It feels like she is getting more comfortable with talking about sex.
  • It feels like female dominant sex is something we both like.  It feels like we will be doing more of this... and she told me to be ready for pain.

Tuesday, June 12, 2012

Female dominance via male orgasms

A sexy rom-com lead to sexy play
We watched a sexy movie together.  It was called Friends with Benefits, with Justin Timberlake and Mila Kunis (sorry, I don't really know who she is).  It was a "romcom" but I enjoyed it because it was sexy.  Let's just say that it was funny, and the sex scenes didn't leave a lot to the imagination.
Going down, Justin?
At any rate, after we finished the movie, Suzy and I got frisky.  We ended up with me on the bottom (*sigh*) and her teasing and tormenting my body.  She was rough, in a good way.  Well, she settled into a position with my legs spread wide and her breasts engulfing my cock.  With my legs spread, she had easy access to not only engulf my dick with her breasts, but to slap my balls with her free hand (ok, I admit that I don't know exactly how she accomplished this, but that is part of the mystique, isn't it?).

She stroked me to orgasm while simultaneously smacking my nuts.  I was deep in "sub-space".  It felt like I came almost against my will, like I was a ball of yarn being played with a cat.  I felt owned by her.  I came not because I wanted to, or I deserved it, or it was time - because she wanted me to.  I suppose that's what's meant by orgasm control.  I had zero control over this scene and I came hard.  It felt so good to surrender to her.
She was the cat, I was the yarn
It didn't end there.

She used the vibrator (she was still on her period) and I dozed off.  Then, not much later, she jerked me off to a second orgasm.  I think I was actually asleep when she started, but it sure didn't seem like it was that much longer.  Alas, I was again a pawn in her chess game.
Just a pawn in her female dominant game
She has repeated the woman on top mammary stimulation again, and then when her period was over, she spanked me with a paddle doing missionary position sex.  I didn't last long - it was such a turnon.

*  *  *  *  *

Alas, we have been quite busy lately.  Not a lot of teasing and sexting and stuff.  We shall see what happens.  This goes to show you that a woman can make a man climax and still feel completely dominated.

Saturday, June 2, 2012

Relationship benefits of dominance/submission

D/S has had a positive benefit on our relationship
Suzy and I had a great date night last night with some other couples.  Unexpectedly, we had a chance to have lunch together as well.  I am extremely horny and Suzy could tell that my mind was racing, and she knew it was about sex play.  We had to speak in coded language when our somewhat overly attentive waitress was nearby.  However, for a good period of time, we had half of the restaurant to ourselves.  I was able to share my most recent femdom fantasies with her (more on that later), but the most important aspect of our time together was our view of our relationship.

We had a rocky marriage about a year and a half ago, and we have seen several marriages around us fall apart.  Our relationship has really been great, especially since around November, when we attended a marriage retreat.  I have made a conscious effort to improve myself and I feel I am a much better husband.

As I had discussed in my prior Love Languages post, physical touch is very important to me.  Sex is a big part of that.  I feel like I have always been "kinky" and wanted to explore sex to the fullest.  A friend of mine in high school once said he was "trisexual", meaning that he would try anything.  I feel that partly describes me.  My masochism is probably the biggest surprise to me.  I have been intrigued with dominant women since I was a kid, but to crave nipple and ball torture?  I wouldn't have predicted that, but I am loving it.  That's what you get from trying things out.
oh my.. how many slaves do you have Mistress?

This is what many of my slaves look like ;)
I've said it before, and will say it again: there is nothing sexier than a confident woman.
I feel loved when Suzy takes charge and is enjoying sex.
In the past, when I had tried to introduce kink in our relationship, I was flat out rejected by Suzy.  Not being able to be open with her about my sexual fantasies lead to a lot of frustration.  Something changed, and she began being more open about hearing them, and acting out on them.  Then, she started to enjoy kinky sex play.

We discussed this change.  Something happened that lead her to be more open to listening to my kinky fantasies and beginning to try some things out.  I suggested that as we get older, we have a tendency to be more open to new things.  Suzy suggested that I might have approached her "in the right way". 

I personally think that couples need to constantly explore new things (not just sexual ones, but since this is a sex blog, that's what I'll focus on).  The exploration of female dominance and male submission has been a key thing to rekindling our intimacy.  I feel like she listens to me now, and I can discuss my crazy sex fantasies with her.  Even though we don't do every crazy sex fantasy that my perverted mind conjures up, being able to freely talk about it means a lot to me.

See, pet, I TOLD you they wouldn’t fall off if I ruined your orgasm last night.
I just love it when Suzy takes charge.  Literally being on top of me is so very sexy.
I think that Suzy is really enjoying our sex life.  I think we are both surprised that she enjoys femdom play as much as she does.  I think it's likely that we will play tonight, and very likely that she will have a powerful orgasm.  I don't know if she will release me, or not.  I don't know what she might want to do tonight.  But the key to making this work is to let her take charge.

We discussed several other things, comparing various other couples that we know, what is going right for them, and where they might be headed.  I do know that submitting to Suzy as a dominant wife has made me feel a lot closer to her.  For us, it's working and keeping things together.  I feel like a newlywed, there are just so many things to try  It's a new and exciting world, even though we have been dabbling in it for a few years now.  I love her.  I can't wait to explore more with her.  Who knows what we will be doing next year?
*  *  *  *  *
Well, that was probably one of my more "feelings" type of posts ever.  Our relationship feels really strong right now, and I hope and pray I don't screw things up somehow.  I could probably go on and on about our discussion over lunch.  But I will close with my most persistent sex fantasies of late:
I know you’d like this one Princess :)

x don’t go anywhere!
Naked and helpless.  She is in total control.  Yes!
  • I took my son to see The Avengers.  In the beginning of the movie, there is a scene where Black Widow is tied with her hands behind her back in a chair.  The bad guys are tormenting her, and she ultimately busts out and kicks everyone's ass.  When I saw that scene, I immediately thought of how hot it would be for me to be tied to a chair, helpless, with Suzy "doing things to me".  HOT!
  • My desire to submit to her naked with her fully clothed has never been higher.  Normally, when we do CFNM play, she is in her bed clothes, which can vary significantly in sexiness.  But what I am talking about is for her to be fully clothed: in a dress, with shoes, hopefully gloves and jewelry.  I fantasize about her inspecting my body, and "doing things to me".  I would feel so dominated and vulnerable.  Then, we would move on to her orgasm, while she is fully clothed.  I am not sure how that could work, but something like, hiking up her dress so I can perform cunnilingus on her.  Feeling her shoes against my back seems like it would be sexy.  Or it could hurt.  Not sure, but I'd love to try.  There is something very big with me on her clothes.  I think psychologically, I view partially clothed sex as very passionate, that you are so into each other, that you don't have time to even take off your lover's clothes.  HOT!
Who doesn’t love amateur femdom :)
CFNM = feeling of vulnerability and desire to further submit.