Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Teasing vs. Humiliation

Since we have started our femdom play, I have enjoyed teasing.  Physical teasing, when Suzy strokes my cock and then either decides that I don't "need" to come or the prolonged teasing results in a really powerful orgasm.  Ironically, when we were dating, Suzy did a lot of teasing and I didn't like it at all.  I didn't have the right submissive frame of mind, I suppose.  She would caress me right above my package and then "accidentally" brush my erect cock.  When she does that now, I still get incredibly frustrated, but I enjoy it as part of the buildup of sexual tension that either results in "sub-space" and shaking if she denies me, or a mind blowing ejaculation if she carries it through.

Verbal teasing is something that I have always enjoyed.  This could take the form of "dirty talk" which I truly love.  During sex, she talks about how she likes my big cock in her and that she can't wait for it to explode, and I never really last long after that.  She can literally talk me into coming.  Another aspect of verbal teasing is when she "smack talks" during a play session.  This is mainly when she is administering cock and ball torture.  I might moan or whine or complain about the pain and she will say things like "don't be a wimp"; "I'm not even hitting them that hard"; or probably the most intense for me: "take it like a man".  I am surprised myself that this turns me on.  It puts me deep into "sub-space" and makes me feel like all the control of my body and especially my manly bits are in her hands.  I have little say in the matter.  That turns me on.
From google image search "male humiliation"
I suppose I would have some performance anxiety if I peed here 
I wonder where the line is between teasing and humiliation.  Recently I have had some sharp bouts with premature ejaculation.  I don't last long at all when given the opportunity to penetrate her.  I think there are many factors that are at play here:

  • the buildup of sexual frustration from the teasing and denial sessions
  • Suzy's becoming more open at discussing sexual fantasies
  • the possibility that Suzy will begin posting on my blog and/or starting her own blog; and my excitement and anxiety over what she might post
Many submissive men crave to be humiliated by their dominants.  I didn't think that would be me, but some things Suzy has said that are borderline "humiliating" did indeed turn me on.  For example:

  • she teased (or humiliated?) me about my lack of stamina. 
  • she makes references to my vasectomy that I find mildly humiliating: such as saying she doesn't "need" my balls anymore and that I "shoot blanks". 
  • She plays to my cuckolding fantasies by openly discussing men she finds "hot".  One time, in front of a bunch of friends, she was asking about a music teacher for our children and she very loudly said, "is he cute"?
  • One time, we had "basement sex" and I was lying on the floor naked, her standing above me gently stimulating my backside while I masturbated to climax.
I have had a lot of sexual fantasies lately, many of which seem to be blurring the line between teasing and humiliation.  It is something that I would like to discuss with Suzy a bit more to see what she likes.

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I believe I have a typically fragile male ego.  Like many men, I am sensitive about my cock size, and anything having to do with my sexual prowess.  Just as I feel extremely powerful when I enable Suzy to climax through my own means (intercourse with her on top, cunnilingus, and fingering her clit), I feel deflated when I don't "measure up" so to speak.  I suppose it's two sides of the same coin.


  1. Teasing and tension are so much fun from my point of view anyway.

  2. Great story and blog. I don't reply much but do read it often. I am sort of 50/50 on teasing/humiliation as to me, they are virtually the same,,,,at least as far as how I do it. :)